Sunday, 8 April 2012

Easter Day pastimes.

It's Easter Day, and after a bit of Churchgoing, it's time for a traditional festive pastime, "Drain Sluicing." It is strange that at Christmas, after the arrival of lots of young visitors, we again indulged ourselves in a spasm of this merry pastime! It is a splendid way of getting the neighbours together for a seasonal chat, and a laugh - we found several half bricks lodged in the bottom of the drain, and the lady next door remarked "Someone has been in a very bad way passing those!" Other neighbours will have wondered what we were all cheering about as the obstruction was removed, and all flowed away as it should. Very Cathartic.
  There is something very appealing in being reunited with an old friend you last passed several days ago. It must be linked to the little bags of dog poo which I find hung on the bushes around the lovely countryside where I have the privilege to walk with my dog. Do the people who do this weird and disgusting thing think that their pet pooches take delight in seeing their past handiwork hung up for public inspection? The owners may enjoy the idea, but I sense, as a dog lover of 70+ years, that their pets would also regard it as a disgusting habit!
  Incidentally, someone has already asked me my age. That, of course, is classified information, but I have given a clue above, and I will just give you one more. When Adolf Hitler heard through his Intelligence network that I had been born, he declared war!
   Thinking of the major players in our Drain Sluicing adventures, reminds me of the two artists I was on about yesterday, for some strange reason.  Some art critic coined a succinct verse which ran:
     "Of the two artists Emin and Hurst, I am not sure quite which is the worst;
               When I look at their "art" I just find I must f**t,
             And a blood vessel threatens to burst."
    Now "The Lady in the Kitchen" is threatening me with being deprived of my Easter Feast, Easter Egg, and hinting at libel suits and much else, so I will close, and let you know later, if still sober, how I have fared during the rest of this joyful festival!

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